Ooh, that’s a fancy title for me on what is just going to be the usual post-travel summary of the cruise we’ve just completed while it’s still reasonably fresh in the mind. It’s not short because I’m a wordy little bugger, and you’d know that already if this isn’t the first of these you’ve ever read, but this was certainly a different cruise in many ways from those we’d had before and from what we’d expected to have this time. Expect the detailed write-ups before the end of 2027 at the current pace of writing.
We have just returned from a cruise of firsts for us, with our first cruise on the oldest of the Grand-class cruise ships, the “Grand White Lady” as she’s referred to by many, Grand Princess. Yes, I’ve really used the word “grand” there three times in one sentence. It was also our first time in the Caribbean, an area of the world we’ve disregarded in the past as we felt its general climate and push towards beaches and snorkelling trips – neither of which hold any interest for us – wouldn’t really suit our travel desires. So there were also a whole load of first times in ports and countries for us too. A surprise to us, it also turned out to be the first time on Princess Cruises that we found ourselves significantly higher up the loyalty ladder compared to other cruisers than we’d expected to be, which turned out to be largely due to this being what one officer told us was “the Puerto Rican experiment”, and our fourteen-day cruise turned out to be two back-to-back seven-day cruises instead which was a first for us as well and brought with it some pros and cons.
Pre-Cruise
Ahead of the flight out, we booked a combined package of hotel stay near London with meet and greet parking at the airport and this generally worked out well although the instructions on where to meet were not correct, referring to signs that didn’t exist. However, no real issues there.
Our cruise started and ended in Puerto Rico but there weren’t any direct flights so flying out we had to go to Madrid, then connect to San Juan. We were worried because this was with Iberia and we’ve had experiences with them in the past with us making trips that our luggage didn’t follow us on, but that all went well on this trip. The landing in Madrid was mildly terrifying when a sudden gust of wind just a second or two before touchdown caused the plane to tilt sharply with the wing on the right dipping right down and probably coming far closer to the ground than anyone aboard liked. There were not-quite-screams from many people followed by nervous, fixed-grin glances all around as the wheels hit and we landed.
We then found our connecting flight with Privilege Style. Nope, not Iberia, nor an airline we’d even heard of, but a change made just the day before to a different type of plane thereby losing our selected seats and not being sat anywhere near each other. The entertainment system aboard was atrocious but everything else was excellent with good seats, legroom, a big bag of toiletries, plenty of food and drink options, and good quality too. I also had the fun experience of being sat in a block of four between a father and mother with an adult daughter on the end who’d obviously been able to work out how to reselect seats (we’d not had enough time nor been given instructions where to find seat selection with the rescheduled plane the day before) and who’d tried the old “book two seats with a space between because nobody will pick it and we’ll get extra room for free” trick that is tiresome, selfish, and doesn’t work when the plane is fully-booked anyway. They eventually asked if I could swap with one of them to an aisle seat so they could all sit together and that worked for me nicely.
The San Juan landing was a hard one with massive deceleration at the end and clapping from most of the Spanish or Puerto Rican passengers. Our first real experience of hearing lots of clapping on a plane and we didn’t care for it. The airport and security were a breeze, getting a taxi from the airport was great with fixed costs to zones and a helpful person arranging everything. Follow the signs and ignore the people asking if you want a taxi inside the building. And then we stayed one night in the Hyatt House hotel, picked because it was close to the Pan American pier where our ship would be (“we could walk there with our luggage!” we wrongly thought) and, for San Juan, was reasonably-priced for a biggish hotel. Our door card didn’t work and the lift trapped us for a while then the toilet wouldn’t flush, but this was all sorted quickly, the room was massive, the shower welcome, the breakfast adequate, and we were happy enough.
Grand Princess Cruise Ship
We ordered an Uber in the morning which arrived in minutes, cost less than ten dollars, and took long enough queuing to get us into the port area behind all the other cars there that we ended up apologising to the driver over and over. Boarding was painless and we were on the ship far earlier than we should have been or expected to be and ended up sitting off the piazza for a while with drinks until the rooms were ready.
Grand Princess, built in the 20th century (remember that century!) was mostly very familiar in layout to us but with some odd quirks here and there that will be covered in the main write-ups. Generally, though, if you’ve cruised on a Grand-class ship then you’ll mostly not be surprised. She was in great condition, not showing her age at all (unless you’re the sort of unrealistic moron who thinks rust on exposed metal on something that spends all its time at sea is a worry) with the exception of some of the seating in Explorers Lounge which was diabolical. Sagging, torn, stained, and worst of all, with that funky smell of Eau de Decades of Sweat and Farts. Overdue a change there.
The crew on Grand Princess were superb and easily some of the best we’ve had on Princess ships. Our cabin steward, bar staff throughout, dining room staff, and officers (because we met and chatted with quite a few) were all generally faultless. We were less impressed with the cruise director (we’d encountered him on a previous cruise before his promotion) and both the food quality and variety were well down on what we’ve encountered before. Some of that was due to running the cruise as week-long durations and utter laziness (perhaps an edict from on high in Princess to cut costs) in dumping the same menus and same entertainment on repeat, making those (few) of us on longer cruises experience déjà vu for free.
We don’t usually single out the captain but Stefano Ravera deserves a lot of praise and he’s instantly become our favourite captain on any ship in any fleet we’ve sailed with. We’ve never seen a captain so present around the ship, always shaking hands, posing for photos, and spending his free time watching and appreciating the musicians, who you could tell felt honoured and uplifted by the experience (it was mentioned by the strings duo a few times, who were, incidentally, amazing). More than that, though, was that he looked after and constantly talked about his crew and about how it was all their doing that the ship ran so well. We know that some passengers on the first week were thrown off for being rude to waiting staff (giving the finger) and that when a bar waiter was telling us this he started to get emotional and told us how everyone loved and respected the captain for things like that. The man’s a true leader and we’ve got signed portrait photos with him, so we’re pretty chuffed about that. No, of course you’re not going to get to see them.
The Puerto Rican Experiment
A big surprise on entering our cabin on the first day was to find an invite to the Captain’s Cocktail Party, not to be confused with the Captain’s Circle Event. The latter is something that a sizeable portion of the ship are invited to once they’ve cruised with Princess a few times, and it’s where you can find stats for how many people are aboard in whatever sorts of loyalty levels, etc. The cocktail party, however, is just for the cream of the cream, as it were; the top forty most-sailed passengers in this case, as we’d learn. This was not something we were expecting. We’ve cruised 230 days now with Princess, which is so far below what is normally the elder Elite level passengers that we’d never even heard of the cocktail party before. We’d get a second invite to the party in the second week as the cruise was running this back-to-back, seven-day cruising schedule in the season.
I’ll describe the party in more detail in the main write-up (sometime) but during the first of these we were talking to one of the officers when he asked how we were finding it and we replied, honestly of course, that we’d been surprised just how many Puerto Ricans appeared to be aboard, how the atmosphere was very different from typical Princess cruises, how there was a little bit of adapting to some behaviour from us (and it would have been nice if some of that adaptation from the locals had been reciprocated but people, eh, what are you going to do with them?), but that we were largely enjoying the culturally very different type of cruise taking place. “Yes,” he said slowly. “We’re all… adapting.” He went on to explain that this was the first time Princess were home-porting out of San Juan in a decade and that there was a push to encourage a younger, local generation to take up cruising with Princess, reflected in some incentives to get them aboard. He didn’t go into specifics but some numbers were mentioned, some remarks about officers and staff seeing definite splits in the people aboard, some eye-opening feedback from passengers and staff, and all part of The Puerto Rican Experiment.
More details in the full write-up, as mentioned, but for this summary post about the cruise I’d just say that the experiment needed some more thought: a ship more in line with hosting Royal Caribbean– or Carnival-type party atmospheres might have been one of the Royal– or even Sphere-class ships. The size and layout of the older Grand Princess but high percentage of Latin-based entertainment caused problems with, for example, simply enjoying a glass of wine in Vines. Nobody else there was drinking wine because it’s not as common as drinking rum, most were large and loud families, and there was roaring fiesta music blaring out from the piazza so often completely upending the atmosphere anyway. There were more examples, but you get the drift.
To finish this section I’ll just confirm then why we were invited to both cocktail parties. On week one there were just 111 Elite guests on board and that dropped to 97 in week two. By contrast, first-timers on a Princess ship (and many might have cruised with other lines, of course) numbered 1595 and 1747 on the respective weeks. That’s a huge ratio, wildly out of place with anything we’ve experienced before. And in the second week the top three most-cruised passengers came in with 556, 364, and 325 nights, which put us just 90 days behind being top three. We’re used to being many hundreds up to over a thousand days behind the top three on many cruises.
Grand Princess Cruise Itinerary
A quick look at the places we visited with the tiniest of highlights mentioned. I’ve said that this was our first time visiting the Caribbean so we picked the itinerary because it was very port-intensive (just two sea days over the two weeks) and gave us a good look at the islands in case we never come back, and because it completed our task of cruising on every Grand-class ship in the fleet. We booked a few excursions but also had a fair number of “let’s just walk around” plans in mind. Beaches and snorkelling don’t interest us, and while we could have had a taxi tour with stops at viewpoints in every port we did have some excursions that did similar and also wanted to see what there was in the ports themselves so opted not to do any of those.
St Thomas (US Virgin Islands)
A wander around port for us day, with highlights being a visit to Fort Christian which we had to ourselves and the Leatherback Brewing Company near the cruise port at the end of the day with its array of locally-made ales using filtered rainwater.
Sint Maarten
Another strolling day, but one with more structure, starting with photographing a lot of the architecture and street art set back from the beach area then visiting the free local museum followed by the Yoda Guy Movie Exhibit where you can see props and read about behind-the-scenes stuff from numerous movies, all run by the special effects makeup artist himself with whom we had a lovely long chat. I particularly liked the background stories and his work on Krull, one of my favourite movies.
Antigua
We took a tour here that brought us to some old batteries and viewpoints on the south of the island with a visit to Nelson’s Dockyard too. The views were lovely but the dockyard wasn’t quite as impressive as we’d hoped. We had a small wander around in St John’s, where we were docked afterwards, and had a drink at a bar with one of the grumpiest bartenders we’ve ever met, and we’re experts at grumpiness.
St Lucia
A lovely tour here saw us visit a small town with beach then numerous viewpoints of the Pitons (pictured because it’s expected) as we made our way to Soufrière, first to visit the truly excellent Diamond Falls Botanical Gardens, then to have some lunch with a lovely view to Petit Piton from up in the hills.
Barbados
The first of two visits to Barbados had us on a tour to visit Harrison’s Cave. Some impressive caverns, one with a waterfall in it, dozens of metres below ground that you visit on carts driven by guides. Surprisingly hot in the caves and at the end you can visit an aviary before heading back. Normally. Poor organisation, conflicting information, only one of three lifts with maximum capacities of six people working, and the result was less than ideal with no aviary visit at all. We did like the caves, though. Some pictures while walking around Bridgetown at the end followed by a visit to the superb Carlisle Brewing (fifteen minutes from the port, opens at 16:00 when we were there). So friendly, absolutely worth a visit, and they do far more than just beer.
Puerto Rico
Back to Puerto Rico to offload one set of passengers and load another set, and due to immigration restrictions we had the choice to either wait in a lounge for several hours or get off before 09:00 and not return until boarding had started. We knew the walk to the old town of San Juan was long and not easy from the Pan American pier and we knew that the taxi situation would be a nightmare so we joined a debark tour with three other back-to-back cruisers to see some highlights then get a lift back to the ship after everyone had been dropped at the airport. The old part of the city looked lovely, full of character, and it’s a shame we couldn’t have docked there because it would all have been walkable.
Tortola (British Virgin Islands)
We walked around here, admiring the views, and got around to the Old Government House which turned out to be an absolute delight. Great views back to the ship across the bay if that’s your thing, lovely rooms and history if that’s your thing, and wonderful gardens at the back if that’s your thing, with some super-friendly staff members too. We stopped at the Pusser’s Pub on the way back and were welcomed by air conditioning colder than many Antarctic regions which was heavenly with a rum cocktail.
St Kitts
Some listed buildings around Independence Square satisfied my architectural appreciation and an encounter with a local who started off by giving us a history of the area before veering off into pretending he was collecting for the local children of former enslaved people if we wanted to hand him some money satisfied our entertainment needs ashore. We did not part with our money.
Dominica
We had such a good day here. We booked an independent tour to head north when everyone else was apparently heading south so it was just us two and two fabulous Americans in the hands of our guide for the day travelling to Portsmouth (which appealed for obvious reasons), visiting cold volcanic springs (the oddest experience to touch them), exploring Fort Shirley, eating local food from a tiny place on the main road in the city, learning more about trees and crabs than we could take in, then having the most memorable rowed boat ride up and down the Indian River with another small group of people, starting off in blazing heat but finishing with a torrential tropical downpour that had everyone creased up in laughter, most of it from the shrieking of the boat’s rower every time he looked back to see a thicker wall of rainwater creeping down the river behind us. One of the best trips we’ve ever done for the laughs and memories.
Grenada
Another wander around the port and surrounding areas day for us, and not a long one because in one direction we encountered a fight between two people, one of whom was swinging a plank of wood with three huge nails in it, and in the other direction an otherwise attractive shallow bay with boats and houses on hills around was rather spoilt by all the crap floating around. A place where you should probably book a tour somewhere just to get away from the unpleasant port area as it turns out.
Barbados
Eventful for our return to Barbados on the last port of call, we booked a trip on an Atlantis submarine which all started off well – down 45 metres, different sea zones, fish, coral, a deliberately-sunk vessel to help form a new habitat, and even a turtle swimming around at one point – but then the air cooling system failed and our submarine became a sub-surface sauna. If crammed in with dozens of other people in an enclosed space deep underwater with sweat running down every crevice (every crevice) appeals then you’d have loved it but for us it required an emergency ascend and the opening of upper hatches to let in the fresh – albeit still hot and humid – air. A short trip which we got a 50% refund on, and a story to tell. We finished up back at Carlisle Brewing where we were greeted like old friends, had hugs from the brewer, fist bumps, handshakes, long chats, the lot. Just make sure to visit if you’re cruising to Barbados.
Grand Princess Cruise Summary
The ship was great, the staff were superb, our fellow passengers were occasionally trying, but we met some wonderful people too. We’d have preferred a more typical Princess cruise feel overall as that’s what we’d expected but we did enjoy the new experience of mixing with a younger, fresher crowd.
We saw a decent variety of sights on the numerous islands we visited so we’re happy with that, and the Caribbean certainly shines with its sunsets. But the port areas for some of the stops were largely interchangeable and it would have been nice to have more identity in each location. Some did, but there were a few that just blurred into a single critical mass of souvenir shops and Diamonds International stores interspersed with taxi drivers looking for business. I don’t doubt that we could have found more to see in each port had we booked trips in all of them but we wanted a proper mix to see how much return appeal there was if you don’t care for beaches, and with this number of ports booking trips in all of them would have added a hefty sum to the cruise price total.
The climate in the region was a killer for us. We’re just not wired for high heat and humidity and that’s the only setting out there. Admittedly, we were there at the start of the cruise season (in a few ports we were the first ship in after the summer break) but when we asked how much cooler or comfortable it got by January we were informed with shrugs “Yeah, not much, but it will rain more.”
So, a lovely trip with loads of firsts as I’ve mentioned, but as a part of the world to return to it’s down the list some way unless there’s a very good deal with a whole load of new islands. And we do know that there are a lot more islands to visit so it could happen.