In Conversation With An I.T. Consultant

19 Aug 2008 12:53 by Mark

Mark, can I bother you for a moment?

Sure.

You know that email we were both sent?

With the zipped build of the trial kitting app? Yeah?

Yes, that's the one.

Okay. Problem?

Well I haven't opened it yet but I just run it right?

I haven't looked at it properly yet so let me just ... okay ... right, well the zip's got the entire directory structure of the app and its libraries ... and there's a setup subfolder with the setup program too so you've got a choice by the looks of it. You can either unzip the zip onto your PC and run the program directly or you can run the setup program in there to get everything installed that way instead if you'd prefer. Okay?

I just double click on the email to run it, yes?

You ... well, no. It depends what you've got installed but the simplest thing is to save the zip and extract it.

You can do that from Outlook yes? Only I've not done this before.

What? Save an attachment?

No, no. I can do Word documents but I've never run a zip before.

But ... but you're our I.T consultant! You've been working in the computer industry for a couple of decades! You've never come across a zip file before?

I don't think so.

You have to have come across a zip file before. The laws of probability dictate it. There's no way you ... look, do you know what a zip file actually is?

Not ... really ... no.

I can't believe this. Okay. It's a way of compressing another file into a smaller size or an entire directory of files into a single file of smaller size so that you can move it from one location to another - like in an email, for example - more easily. You don't "run" the zip file, you open it and let the contents out. Think of it as a suitcase jammed full of clothes.

Okay, I'm following you. Someone has sent me a "suitcase" full of clothes, right?

Right.

And now I've got to "open" my "suitcase" and take out the clothes.

You're getting it.

And I do that by running my email.

What!? No. What? You can't run an email.

No, not "run", of course, that's just the wrong word, sorry. I download it, yes?

Download? Download what?

My email.

What are you talking about? Your email is already "downloaded" and sitting in your Outlook inbox.

Oh, right! I get you! I can run it from my inbox then.

No!

No, not "run", I ...

No!

Oh, upload!

No! No! Do you actually know anything about computers?

Hey, there's no need to get testy. You're not really explaining things very well to be fair.

Well I guess I don't have what it takes to be a consultant then.



A sadly true tale.

 

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