Paris Hilton's range
21 Feb 2005 19:42 by Mark
By now there are four people in Peru who haven't been able to see all the latest Paris Hilton photos so this article, like all my articles, is primarily aimed at them for when they're released by the rebels seeking independence and a return of Paddington.Paris "Goshdarnit, I'm In The News Again" Hilton has recently had her phone cracked and all the stored pictures, email addresses, and phone numbers were leaked to that bane in Ms Hilton's life: the internet.
Do you know anyone with a phone camera? You do! Well, does that person have nothing but 98,000 photos of themself stored in their phone's memory? They don't! Guess you don't know Paris Hilton then. Now, I'm not saying she's narcissistic, but the only other explanation I can think of is that she thinks you have to look at the small round lens to take a picture.
Paris is certainly one for self-promotion and I wouldn't put it past her to have had this leak arranged but regardless of the outcome of all this I did make a discovery during my perusal of her personal portfolio: she could always make it as a model.
Look at the range!
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I think a walk off is in order!
Now this will be a straight walk-off - old school rules - first model walks, second model duplicates, then elaborates.
I'm sure I've seen some pictures of Miss Hilton modelling for The big fat pink cigar company where she was demonstrating a much extended range.
Joke extrapolated from your advise on dealing with the British:
Q: What do the Scotts, Welsh, and the Irish have in common?
A: Nothing you Limey prick now go brush your f***ing teeth!
I had to buy the guy 15.5 (.5 being a midget and who doesn't love 'em) hookers to calm him down once he figured out just what I said to him.
Sir you will be billed accordingly.
And I'm suing Ms. Hilton because her "magnum" pose looks very much like my patented, "sooo, i'm not getting the job afterall?" pose and her "ferarri" gaze looks alot like my, "so what WOULD it take for me to get the job afterall?" stance, which is usually followed by my, "ok, don't call security please...i'll escort myself out" that' i've been perfecting as of late.
Or am I missing something?
Edwin Garay that Phone No don't work, coz I got my girlfriend to ring you from a callbox! You probabably ain't using your real name either, as there's no Garay in the phone book!
Men hun har skikkelig god kles smak.
Hilsen Norge :p