Talk Like A Pirate

Skull and Crossbones!September 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day.

During September 19th (GMT) this site will be taken over by pirates! Arrr!

But, fear ye not, ye landlubbin’ swine!

Unless you have hidden booty on you.

Pirates can smell booty a nautical mile off. If you have any hidden booty on you then I’d seriously consider panicking. Perhaps get in a few plank-walking practices. Rehearse your cowering plea for mercy. Erase from your memory any jokes about eye patches you might possibly have heard. That sort of thing.

Rest assured! The piratical assault will be repelled come September 20th matey!

Author: Mark

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  1. Piracy is a crime, you know. Please refrain from glamourising it in such a lightweight manner.

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  2. Buckle any swashes you might have on your persons.

    Blistering barnacles? Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles back at you sir! Although I’m not convinced Captain Haddock counts as a pirate.

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  3. Garrr, I’ll wager ten doubloons Lord Likely be a soft land lubber ne’er to ‘ave tasted the cat o’ nine tails cuttin’ it’s raw mark on ‘is gentlemanly backside. An’ a good keelhaulin’ for any scurvy dog that say otherwise.

    Now ’tis time I find me a wench an’ make ‘er scream wi’ a wannion whilst plunderin’ ‘er skirts for the fine booty thar beneath.

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  4. I love pirates! Arrrghhh, maties!!! Let’s have we a swashbuckling festival with buffles of rum and women we took as booty from a yonder village on shore. What say ye?! Shiver me timbers, yer a landlubber after all!!! Ha!

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  5. "Harrrr," said the burly pirate.

    "Harr?" asked the lusty wench.

    "Aye. Harrrr"

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  6. Yarr! Pirate Paraphernalia Checklist:

    * Eyepatch? – Check
    * Pirate Hat and/or Bandana – Check
    * Fake Grey Beard or Black Beard with Burning wicks (optional) – Check
    * Peg Leg with realistic "clomp, clomp" sound – Still need
    * Hook (partly rusty) – a "must"
    * Real or Plastic Parrot – Looking for
    * Great Coat what Stinks of twenty years of dried blood and salt water – ewwwe!
    * Gold Doubloons to flash around – got to bank for Sacajewea Dollars
    * Blowsy Shirt – Borrow from Mom
    * Nasty-dirty trousers – Borrow from Dad
    * Big Leather Boots – ???
    * Big Leather Boots – ???!!!
    * Big Leather BOOTS!!! – Aww, Hell, just wear some Nikes and tell everyone ye be a Cross Trainin’ PIrate

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