Stunning Medical Facts That Will Stun You

Is your anti-stun helmet in place? What’s that? No anti-stun helmet? Well then, get thee to a comfy chair as quickly as possible! Why? Because there’s some stunning coming up and I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why.

Medical FactPrepare to be stunned with these stunning medical facts that will stun you!

  • The human ear is over 40% fruit.
  • You can tell someone’s age by seeing how long it is before they react to eye-poking.
  • After the menopause a woman’s knees start to drift downwards.
  • 1 in 5 Americans suffer from a superfluous third arm.
  • Pressing the right combination of freckles will flip open a person’s head.
  • Lips are a relatively modern evolutionary adaptation to the face, replacing velcro.
  • The clitoris extends for three metres inside the female.
  • In addition to sweat, armpits also secrete WD-40 to prevent squeaking.
  • Eskimos are born with an extra internal organ that breaks down whale blubber into mint juleps.
  • The human body can withstand pressures up to seven but I’m forbidden from telling you what scale I’m using.
  • The strongest material in nature is an old lady’s cankles.
  • A tribe of natives in South America spend their entire adult lives inside-out.
  • In an emergency the colon can double as bungee cord.
  • Tastebuds are extremely sensitive and should not be allowed to see Steven Spielberg movies.
  • Women feel no pain during childbirth but have a natural instinct to try to make men feel guilty.

But wait! There’s more stunning!

  • The gag reflex is nature’s defence against sword-swallowing.
  • The adrenal gland is also responsible for humming in humans.
  • Rapid eye movement is an autonomic response to lice fidgeting under your eyelids.
  • There is as much vitamin C in male ejaculate as in a common or garden house brick.
  • "Friendly bacteria" will not return your lawnmower if they borrow it.
  • Bald men are compensated by wide-ranging and thick forests of pubic hair.
  • A person will remain conscious for 15 seconds following decapitation but instantly loses the ability to sigh.
  • A woman reaches her sexual peak ten minutes after her man has fallen asleep.
  • People with eyes of different colour are actually twins who coalesced in the womb.
  • With concentration and practice the anus can work as a gill underwater.
  • 25% of the brain’s functions are dedicated to avoiding choking while eating biscuits.
  • Nostrils are purely for decoration.
  • Laughter is not the best medicine for people with split sides.
  • Leprosy is not contagious if you only touch elbows.
  • Lifting the toenails reveals some handy storage space.
  • The unattractive appearance of the scrotum is a genetic device designed to frighten away intruders from the rear.

Author: Mark

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8 Comments

  1. I’m stunned, although I already new about the emergency bungee cord colon thing.

    I read the original draft of the film Waterworld, and at the end it had Kevin Costner’s character rescue the wee kid from the water using this very method.

    Screen tests showed that film goers vomited less when he just used a rope instead.

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  2. A woman reaches her sexual peak ten minutes after her man has fallen asleep

    How convenient – that’s roughly the time I emerge from the wardrobe.

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  3. Tam: screen tests showed that filmgoers vomited even less when Kevin Costner was not in the scene.

    Grazor: you’ve fallen into my trap! I knew it was you! GET OUT OF MY WARDROBE!

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  4. …gag reflex is nature’s defence against sword-swallowing.

    Why do my dates always tell me this is from kissing?

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  5. "Why do my dates always tell me this is from kissing?"

    In England we kiss with our mouths not our penises. It’s a shame really.

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  6. I knew it! People always wonder how they can have sex with a mermaid, and I always knew they had equipment that worked like gills, with the tale starting lower. Disney always whitewashes the truth.

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  7. Now Deb has pointed it out, it seems obvious…

    I’m off to block a mermaids blowhole!

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  8. In England we kiss with our mouths not our penises. It’s a shame really.

    I’m so sorry.

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