"Hi, do you have a minute to answer a few questions?"
"That depends; are they about hats?"
"Hats? Oh, ha ha! No, no, nothing like that."
"Well that's good. I don't really know much about hats."
"No, these are questions about…"
"My wife, on the other hand, is quite knowledgeable where it comes to headwear. It's quite odd, really. I'm not sure why she knows the things she knows."
"Hmmm, that is odd, but, anyway, these questions aren't about hats at all."
"Then again, she has an irrational hatred of Peruvians – she considers them a deceptive bunch and it ires her immensely – and your hat looks like it's from that region."
"She'd probably get quite agitated if she saw your hat, thinking you were a Peruvian. You're not a Peruvian are you?"
"I'm not a Peruvian, no."
"Mind, you'd probably deny it if you were on account of your deceptive nature."
"I… don't really know what to say to that."
"Never mind. I've got nothing against Peruvians anyway, so you can ask me anything."
"Just nothing about hats."
"It won't be about hats, I promise."
"Then fire away!"
"Great! Which would you prefer to wear: a trilby or a sombrero?"
"You said you wouldn't…"
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